Each of us perceives the other via their perceptual mechanism which is heavily filtered & biased, to help us see what we want to see, and to screen out what we don't want to see.
And via Jung, each of us has a psychological construct he calls the Anima. This contains all of our hopes & dreams of The Goddess. We want to see this so much that our perceptual mechanism gets its image burnt into our mind, so stimulus is magnetized / interpreted that way.
It's like a hologram we project because it's what we need. Now if there's just a doll there or an enigmatic radiance then we like that very much; signal to noise ratio vis a vis the anima that is projected right over that other being's actual face causes resonance & pleasure.
Dissonance and disturbance occurs when we project that anima over the face of a real humanbean and it doesn't fit, it doesn't match, it has elements that deviate from the Golden Anima.
This phenomenon of perception helps to explain why presenting a titilicious female form tends to get men roused up by reminding them of their Anima, so in their desire for the rapture of the true Anima, they lay a heavy burden on the real person over there who has ways and details that fracture the fantasy simply by being a real person.
Then because they don't understand that what they see is a projection of their own desire, that gets in their way of seeing a PERSON over there... they get mad and blame you for being something more, something less, something different.
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